AHA moments

Weight had always been an issue for me. It was something that I remember struggling with as a young girl. My Mom and I joined weight watchers and I 'graduated' (the first time) when I was 12 years old. I remember receiving my Gold Key and a stick - to keep the boys away. The group provided a lot of support.
My Senior year in High School I wanted to lose weight for prom. So I changed my eating habits and followed a low fat diet and began walking the track on a regular basis. My Senior Prom I looked amazing. And I was the thinnest I had ever been :) I remember all those walks and eating salads for dinner, and how accomplished I felt to reach a goal. 
In college my weight yo-yo'd. I understood that exercise was beneficial, but I didn't make it a priority. One of my roommates walked daily! And when I could I joined her - she was quick!! But exercise was not a focus for me.
As I got older, life got busier. Hanging out with my friends, eating, drinking (recuperating from the drinking) became my priority. There were times that I paid attention to my eating, and I followed a 'diet'. But from 1996ish until 2009 I did not find time to exercise at all. Didn't really think about it at all.

In 2008 I had the opportunity to watch my brother and his wife run the Newport Marathon. I was excited to be able to be there to support them. I was at the start line. I moved around on the course to see them at different points in the race and cheer them on. I attempted to run along beside them, to keep up with them and show my support. I thought I was going to die. I waved them on and wondered how they were running 26.2 miles and I couldn't do .2. I remember watching them cross the finish line. How proud I felt to see them coming and cheering them on to the finish. With tears in my eyes, amazed at their accomplishment, a proud big sister! It has had a lasting impression on me.

The beginning of 2009 was time for a life change. One of my biggest AHA moments. I joined a local Yoga/Pilates studio, and signed up for their 'Wellness Ranch'. A 3 month commitment of taking classes, working with a nutritionist, and meeting with the instructors. I found that I really enjoyed yoga and the flow of the movements and your breath. I learned SO much from the nutritionist and asked her questions for years after. I learned the importance of choosing the foods you put into your body and really began to read labels. I changed to a more organic, whole foods, clean eating meal plan. I learned the importance of the nutrition of foods (100 calories of chocolate isn't the same as a 100 calories of cheese or 100 calories of broccoli). Through changing the foods that I ate, and tracking the foods that I ate, I lost a whole size in my clothes. And I didn't feel like I had made any huge change in my eating habits (except maybe eating more).
In May I watched my brother run his 2nd marathon. His wife was unable to run, but traveled the course on her bicycle providing support. Again I was able to follow him around the course and see them at different points in the race to cheer him on. I again tried to run along beside him to show my support, and to my surprise I got much further this time. I didn't feel like I was going to die! I watched him cross the finish line, cheering him on. Once again proud of his accomplishment.
When I got back home I decided I was going to try to start running. I ran 15 steps down my driveway,,,and again thought I was going to die. But I did 15 steps the next day; and asked my sister-in-law for advice (about running, and breathing, and whether or not I was going to die). 15 steps turned into 20, 20 turned into 27, 27 turned into 35. And 35 steps turned into a quarter mile, the length of my driveway. Then the quarter mile turned into a half mile - down and back up the driveway. By July I was ready for my first 5K race! And it just kept getting better.

2009 was a major turning point for me. I found myself. I enjoyed my life because of what I was putting into it. I am grateful that I found something that had such an impact on my life. I am grateful I have had people there to support me. I feel that exercise and nutrition were a game changer. I'm where I am today because of the choices I made in 2009.

The move 2004

In 2004 I moved from KY to PA. The move was work related, and planned. When I moved I made the decision that I was going to quit drinking and quit smoking. Both had been a very big part of my life for many years. I got VERY good at drinking. I knew that in order for me to become a happier person I needed to change my habits. Quitting was the first step.
I was happy with the decision. The biggest challenge was that it changed how I interacted with people. I spent the first year not knowing how to hang out with my friends back home in RI. I didn't go home as much as I could have.
I worked two jobs, so I was never bored. And I learned how to crochet, so I kept my hands busy while I was home. My nutrition was still a challenge. I ate what I liked. I ate what fit into my time schedule. Taco Bell, Wendy's, Dunkin Donuts were all located on the road I took to my second job so they supplied dinner and midnight snacks. When the office had snacks I would eat some, and bring some back to my desk. I would wrap the food in paper towels, hide it under the papers I was carrying, so no one really knew how much I was eating.
Me in 2005:

In 2005 I decided that life was unfair and the only thing I could really control was my eating. So I stopped eating the 'junk'. I cut out carbs. I cut out sugar. Concentrated on fruits, vegetables, 'healthy' snacks, sugar free desserts. Restricting my diet gave me a sense of control. The weight started to come off. I didn't really miss what I wasn't eating, or at least that's what I told myself. I was making healthier choices. I have learned that I still had a long way to go.
Over the next few years I kept my 'diet' under control. I continued to lose weight. I did not exercise other than the occasional walk with family or through the woods. I felt ok. I felt like I had control over what I looked like. More changes came over the next few years: another move, a new job. Another big life change - my first A-HA! moment - came at the beginning of 2009. That's when I learned about nutritional eating and the benefits of exercise.

The beginning

Talking about me has always been one of the hardest things to do. But I want to share my journey with you...where I was when I started, where I am today...and the many steps in between. There is a lot to tell.

So I'll start with 2002. I was the biggest, unhealthiest I ever was. I enjoyed food. I enjoyed drinking. I enjoyed smoking. I enjoyed life. I wore a size 18/20, and was proud of it! I had decided that I was just going to be a big girl forever. That the plus clothes were designed for me. I may have one picture from that time, though I haven't been able to find it.

In 2003, a girlfriend helped me change the way I eat. We started together. She offered me the book she had been reading. And some of the weight came off. I was SO excited the afternoon I fit into size 14 capris!! And this was all from changing what I ate! I had never been one to exercise (that came many many years later).
So I spent the next year watching what I ate. I quit drinking and smoking at the end of January 2004. I was starting to get healthier. But food is such a distraction! And eating is SO much fun. In 2005 I hadn't really lost much more. I didn't pay as much attention to what I was eating. And working two jobs left me little time to care about what I was eating. With Taco Bell being open on the way home from the store, and Dunkin Donuts being open on the way into the office...I ate well.
So I was again happy with who I was. Comfortable at a size 14. Enjoying the life I was living.